Modest Breastfeeding
Shari Ann Wenzel
Hometown, IL USA
From: NEW BEGINNINGS, Vol. 19 No. 5, September-October 2002, pp. 175-176
When it comes to my chest
I am not a low-cut-shirt kind of woman. I am not a tube top woman or
a bikini woman. I prefer to wear oversized sweatshirts, long-sleeve
t-shirts, and turtlenecks. I enjoy lounging in a one-piece swimsuit
covered up by a t-shirt and shorts. My breasts are a very private for
me. Breastfeeding, although a very natural process, became a personal
concern when I learned I was pregnant.
I didn't worry over whether
my water would break at my workplace, or whether my house would be remodeled
in time for the new baby. I never worried that my body would triple
in size. I had one nagging concern: my modesty. My comfortably tucked-away
breasts would be the center of the universe for my new baby. I was certain
I could handle all my baby's attention but uncertain if I could handle
the attention I might draw from breastfeeding in front of friends, family,
and the public.
I admit I am shy about my
body and avoid drawing attention to my chest, but there was no way to
steer clear of my breasts as I prepared for breastfeeding. I watched
my small chest slowly blossom two full cup sizes and came to terms with
how a shy woman could become a confident nursing mother. Fortunately,
my pregnancy provided me with eight months to confront my inhibitions.
I prepared for my journey by asking myself two pivotal questions. Whose
presence would I be comfortable with when breastfeeding? Where would
I be comfortable breastfeeding?
I decided, with not much
surprise, that I would only be comfortable breastfeeding around my husband,
mother, and sisters. That was where I would draw the line. I resigned
myself to the fact that any visitors to our home during feeding time
would not be entertained until breastfeeding had finished. I would have
to excuse myself to the bedroom for mother and baby time.
Since my comfort zone for
breastfeeding my child would be limited to my immediate family, this
would mean I would be restricted to few public engagements after the
baby arrived. I knew I would be comfortable breastfeeding in my home
and my parents' home, but definitely not in public. I decided that family
parties, long shopping trips, and vacations were out of the question.
Although I was certain about
my pre-baby decisions, I discovered that I actually loosened up a little
after Madeline arrived. I discovered I could be a little more flexible.
I found I was comfortable breastfeeding in the new mothers' room at
the local baby superstore. I nursed in a friend's bedroom during a huge
housewarming party. I even nursed in front of my husband's best friend.
I'll admit I never did reach a comfort level to breastfeed at the mall,
in front of my in-laws, or during trips to the park. I didn't take many
trips outside of my home and my social engagements were limited. I was
still rather conservative but much braver and open about my inhibitions
than I thought I could be. Having a child changed the way I thought
about my breasts. Why? Maybe it was all the poking and prodding they
did at the hospital, the hospital gowns that left little to the imagination,
reading every written piece about breastfeeding I could find, or quizzing
my friends about breastfeeding.
Maybe it was the realization
that my breasts were not sex objects but rather a source of food and
comfort for my baby. And certainly, it was becoming a mother and doing
what I felt was best for my baby. I let go and let love happen and everything
else fell into place.
Last updated Tuesday, August 29, 2006 by njb.
Page last edited Sun Oct 14 09:30:22 UTC 2007.
